Confucian values in South Korea emphasise the importance of family and respect for elders, promoting a “collective self” mindset. Unlike Western individualism, Koreans often view themselves as integral parts of a larger whole, like their family, friends, and community. However, recent cultural shifts have led Koreans to recognise that self-love is just as vital as caring for others, thanks partly to K-celebrities vocal about it.
How to Love Yourself, According to K-celebrities
Through songs, campaigns, or endorsements, Korean celebrities have become ambassadors of “loving yourself first” to improve mental wellness. They encourage their followers to show themselves kindness and accept their strengths and weaknesses. You, too, can ease into a better version of yourself with the help of these K-celebs.
1. Practise positive self-talk.
Global pop icon BTS recognised the value of treating yourself with the same respect and compassion you would give someone else. The group approached UNICEF to launch the “Love Myself” campaign, which mobilised the BTS Army to spread positive messages of self-love.
For BTS leader RM, this meant giving himself a pep talk when he makes mistakes or finds faults in his life. “You may be a little shy at first, but why don’t you send these words of encouragement to yourself: ‘I’m doing well, I love myself!’”
2. Avoid comparing yourself to others.
As the saying goes, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” BTS member Suga agrees, saying comparing yourself to others is one of the easiest and fastest ways to make yourself unhappy.
Instead, “adore yourself” if you feel a sense of inferiority. That’s the core message of “Queencard,” one of the songs of K-pop girl group (G)I-DLE. “You can be a beautiful person if you adore yourself. And if you adore yourself, others will adore you,” (G)I-DLE leader Soyeon says in The Korea Times.
3. Work hard on self-compassion.
Most Korean celebrities brace themselves for criticism after performances or even red-carpet appearances. During these times, K-pop group IVE member Jang Won Young relies on self-love to help her focus on what matters most.
“I love myself very much,” Won Young tells Cosmopolitan Korea, adding how she doesn’t allow the views or words of others to affect her. Her confident personality comes from her parents and fans: “From a young age, my parents helped me grow up in love, and now I’m able to love myself because I’ve grown up with the love of my fans. We hope that people who listen to our songs will also be able to love themselves.”
4. Give yourself some breathing space.
K-drama superstar Song Hye-Kyo describes self-love as staying true to her beliefs and having the freedom to choose, especially in her career. “As an actress, I am constantly finding new ways to reinvent how I play different characters,” she says in an interview with Tatler magazine.
Hye-Kyo intentionally sets aside “me-time” to excel in her craft and focus on her growth. “It is very important to take occasional breaks to recharge and reflect on my purpose and aspirations. So I venture into each new character I embody with a fresh and a renewed perspective.”
5. Learn to trust yourself.
Actress Kim Seol Hyun admitted in a 2015 interview that her confidence fell after reading comments about her weight and looks. However, the AOA member gradually learned that confidence from within helped her deal with the criticism better.
“I don’t want to be swept away by other people or a job that receives a lot of attention. To do that, I realised how important it is to love myself,” Seol Hyun shares in a magazine profile four years later. “I want to have the freedom to express what I wanted to say rather than pay attention to others, and I am learning how to respect and love myself in the process.”
The Benefits of Self-Love
Self-positivity bias (the scientific term for self-love) results in numerous benefits, as research published in Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience journal confirmed. Participants who had positive perceptions of themselves exhibited:
- Improved self-acceptance
- Increased motivation and productivity
- Higher confidence
- Lower anxiety
- Better life quality
The truth is, everyone can use a little more love, superstar or not. More people need to know that loving themselves means accepting every aspect of their identity rather than just the parts they feel proud of. And they become empowered to do so when the likes of Korean superstars openly share their struggles with self-esteem.
However, self-love takes practice, and you can start with the valuable lessons from these K-celebrities. Putting your needs first may begin with something tangible like treating yourself to a beautiful smile. Step one: Visit your dentist and inquire about ClearCorrect dental aligners that can treat misaligned teeth without disrupting your daily routine. Then, on your next pre-party glam sesh, say something nice to yourself in the mirror. You deserve it. Fighting!
References:
5 Ways To Love Myself by BTS – LOVE MYSELF. (2018, August 8). LOVE MYSELF.
동선화. (2023, May 18). ‘Queencard’: (G)I-DLE spreads message of self-love. Koreatimes.
장원영 “저 스스로를 오롯이 사랑해”[화보]. (n.d.).
Blessedkpop. (2019, May 24). AOA’s Seolhyun opens up about learning how to love herself. Soompi.
Darling, A. (2021, October 6). Song Hye-Kyo On Feminism And Self-Love: “I hope to help all women find their own definition of femininity.” Tatler Asia.
Fields, E. C., & Kuperberg, G. R. (2015). Loving yourself more than your neighbor: ERPs reveal online effects of a self-positivity bias. Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience, 10(9), 1202–1209.
Leejd. (2015, November 9). Seolhyun discusses her figure and hateful comments with high cut. Soompi.
